My life's in the shitter right now, and if you don't mind, I'd like to stew a bit.

Original post: August 24, 2006

I really wish I knew why I'm the way I am. Talking to girls has never been easy for me, but I've managed to do it in the past. I've been in a slump for the past five years or so. No matter how much I want to think so, I've never gotten myself back into the dating field. I've written blogs about why that is in the past, so I'm not going to repeat myself here.

My biggest problem lately has been the fact that I get high expectations whenever I find a girl even the slightest bit attractive. It doesn't help that my friends are there to boost those expectations even higher. When I find out they have a boyfriend, I crash like I just quit Heroin cold turkey. Everything always seems to collapse around it, even though it really had nothing to do with my life. I put everything up on this pedestal, and then it topples over after one meaningless fact is revealed.

Well, no more. I've had it. No more actively searching for girls that I know are not going to have any interest in me. I can't continue to live my life as if someone's going to miraculously decide they want to spend the rest of their life with yours truly. Fuck all of you. I'll die alone, thank you very much.